As I was signing into WordPress the other day, I saw a Freshly Pressed blog about the ridiculousness of the bouquet toss by Girl on the Contrary. She’s right, the toss is pretty ridiculous, hair has been ripped out in the name of bouquets. I did the bouquet toss at my wedding; I had a few eager friends who were anticipating it and I had some family members not take kindly to other attempts at the non-traditional (did I ever blog about the favor fiasco?) The only change I made to the bouquet/garter toss was to not force the two catchers have any contact with each other (no dance, no putting the garter on the woman’s leg, no awkwardness.) I wish I’d thought about it a little bit more.
It seemed like the bouquet toss just had to happen so I never thought of alternatives, but there were some amazing ones suggested in the comments section of Girl on the Contrary’s post. Here’s a few of my favorites:
1. Call the single ladies up to the dance floor and give them each a shot. Cheers to being single!
2. Give the bouquet to a woman who means a lot to you. You could make it a big deal by giving a little speech about why you’re giving the bouquet to this woman, thanking her for all she’s done, why you love her so much, etc. etc. Or you could be discreet and just take a private moment to give it to her (though that’s very hard to do at a wedding, you will be pulled in different directions all night.)
3. Just don’t do it! Tell the DJ you don’t want it,(s)he won’t announce it, and I’ll bet most guests won’t even notice it’s not happening until after the reception is over (except for the keeners who planned on poking other women’s eyes out to get closer to the bouquet.) Most of the guests don’t like it anyway. This way you can keep your bouquet if you want to dry it or whatever people do with their old bouquets.
If you met your fiancé at a wedding after you caught the bouquet and he caught the garter, I expect that you’ll keep the tradition alive at your wedding and that’s just fine. But if you’re questioning it, you’re not alone. There’s no wedding law that says you have to throw your bouquet, so remember that the choice is yours. If you do throw your bouquet, make sure you tell your photographer to get good shots of it. One of my favorite photos of my wedding is of the bouquet toss where the bouquet had landed on my friend W’s feet while she stared at it in disgust and my husband’s cousin M ran away. The photo literally shows her running away. It’s a classic and it shows you that no one really wants to catch the bouquet, they won’t miss it if you omit it.